Anime Play Lord of the Rings
by Pyra Moonsword
Summary: OK, so the titles not too good. This had anime characters auditioning for parts in a LotR play
1. Hobbits

Pyra: Hey, guys, Pyra Moonsword here and you get to help me with my newest fic! Ain'chu lucky! So here are the rules: I list characters from Lord of the Rings and characters to portray them. You pick who plays each LotR character and then, in the end, I write a play version of LotR, using the people YOU selected. Got it? Ok, then, let's begin. But first.*prays* Oh, Great Ladies Thalia and Calliope, please help me too write a good, humorous, fanfiction. Thank you.  
  
Damien: *appears* *bows* And I am Damien, Lady Pyra's faithful personal Muse.  
  
Pyra: First we start with the Hobbits  
  
Frodo Baggins  
  
Usagi (Sailor Moon): *walks out* *looks at script* "I must" *trips* Owwwww!!! Vote for meeeee!!!  
  
Everyone else: *busts out laughing*  
  
Makoto (SM): *looks at script* "I must destroy the Ring!" I should get the lead because I have such a big.uh.resume  
  
Yugi (Yu-Gi-Oh!): "I must destroy the Ring" Please vote for me! *Yami takes over* I will duel you for the role!  
  
Vegeta (DragonBallZ): *forms ki ball* Why am I doing this? Oh, yeah, to beat Kakarot. (Pyra: how do you spell that?) Vote for me or die!  
  
Goku (DBZ): Hi! *waves* Is this Frodo guys strong?  
  
Pyra: Just read the script Goku.  
  
Goku: "I must destroy the Ring!" *looks at Pyra* Why can't I just crush it? A ring can't be tougher them Cell.  
  
Miaka (Fushigi Yuugi): *studies script* This is hard! *sees All-You-Can- Eat buffet* *ignores script and begins wolfing down the food*  
  
Damien: Do you think we should stop her?  
  
Pyra: No. Maybe she'll choke to death.  
  
Tamahome (FY): Before I try out, I want to know one thing. Do I get paid? *sees Miaka* MIAKA! It doesn't mean you eat all of it!  
  
Miaka :*starts choking on a chicken leg*  
  
Tamahome: *does Heimlich, saves Maika*  
  
Pyra: Damn.  
  
Miaka: *hugs Tamahome*  
  
Bilbo Baggins  
  
Queen Serenity (SM): Excuse me, Pyra. Why do want me to play some old guy?  
  
Pyra: Just read the lines  
  
QS: *blandly* "I am going. I am leaving now. Goodbye."  
  
Grandpa (SM): *looks at QS* *looks at Pyra* Goodbye! *follows QS*  
  
Grandpa (YGO): I would like to say that I will attempt to win this audition fairly and will trust in the heart of the script.  
  
Pyra: *sweatdrops*  
  
Grandpa (YGO): "I am going. I am leaving NOW. GODDBYE!" *leaves*  
  
Tai Itsukun (FY): I am going. I am leaving NOW. GOODBYE! *vanishes into thin air*  
  
Samwise Gamgee  
  
Chibi-Usa (SM): "Mr. Frodo, Mr. Frodo! Hang on, Mr. Frodo, your Sam is coming to help you!" Could Mamoru be Frodo?  
  
Pyra: No, but he gets to audition for Sauron.  
  
Chibi-Usa: Oh. Yay! Mamo-chan is coming!!  
  
Tasuki (FY): *has had too much to drink* *puts on high-pitched girly voice* "Mr. Frodo, Mr. Frodo! Hang on, Mr. Frodo, your Sam is coming to help you!" Whadda wimp. I wanna win this just so I can have some fun.  
  
Yui (FY): "Mr. Frodo, Mr. Frodo! Hang on, Mr. Frodo, your Sam is coming to help you!" *Tatsuya in the audience claps enthusiastically, as does Suboshi. Both glare at each other*  
  
Chichi (DBZ): "Gohan! Gohan! Hang on, Gohan! 'Kaasan is coming to help you!"  
  
Pyra: Frodo, Chichi-san, Frodo, not Gohan. He can take care of himself.  
  
Lobelia Sackville-Baggins  
  
Chibi-Usa (SM): I want it, I want it!  
  
Pyra: Perfect! Perfect Chibi-Usa!  
  
CU: But, I didn't even read the script yet, I was yelling at Usagi because she won't give me a donut.  
  
Miaka (FY): *is crying because Tamahome took some of her food away* Give it to me!  
  
Pyra: Wow, I don't know who's more convincing, Miaka or Chibi-Usa.  
  
Damien: They both have natural talent for this sort of role, don't they?  
  
Yui (FY): *pulls Tamahome's arm* He's mine!  
  
Miaka(FY): *pulls Tamahome's other arm* No, he's mine!  
  
Yui and Miaka: *pulling Tamahome's arms* MINE! NO MINE! NO MINE!!  
  
Damien, Tasuki, and many of the other guys: *feel sorta bad, cause no one fights over them*  
  
Hamwise (Gaffer) Gamgee  
  
Pyra: Before this audition begins, would anybody mind telling me what a gaffer is? *crickets chirp* No one? Drat. Now, first up for is audition is..*looks at list* WHAT?! Nobody signed up for Gaffer? Oh, come on! Well, someone just gotta tell me who can play the Gaffer.  
  
Gaffer (LotR): I could be Gaffer.  
  
Pyra: No, you can't. You can't play yourself, and you're not an anime character. It's against the rules.  
  
Gaffer: Oh. Well, if you need me.  
  
Meriadoc (Merry) Brandybuck  
  
Pyra: *looks at list* Oh, sure, we have tons for Merry and Pippin, but no one for The Gaffer. Hmph  
  
Minako (SM): "We'll take the Bucklebury Ferry" Hey, that rhymes! Bucklebury Ferry, Bucklebury Ferry!  
  
Makoto (SM): I can do better. *does same as Minako*  
  
Nuriko (FY): *looks at Minako* I can do better than that. *does the same as Minako and Makkoto* Hey, it does rhyme! *Minako, Makoto, and Nuriko go off skipping and singing*  
  
Seto Kaiba (YGO): I'm going to kill you Pyra. I refuse to do this.  
  
Pyra: ^__^ You can't kill me. It's against the rules. And you're already auditioning.  
  
Seto: No, I'm not, I haven't read the script yet.  
  
Pyra: Doesn't matter. People can still vote for you.  
  
Seto: Fine, but I'm only doing this to beat Wheeler. (Monotone) "We'll take the Bucklebury Ferry."  
  
Joey (YGO)(AN: Using American names because many people know them by those names, but I might use the Japanese ones later, cause I like them better): *seems slightly hyper* I can't let Kaiba beat me! "We'll take the Bucklebury Ferry!"  
  
Tristan (YGO): I'll win to impress Serenity! "We'll take the Bucklebury Ferry!"  
  
Tasuki (FY): More fun! "We'll take the Bucklebury Ferry" *is drunk* I like fairies.  
  
Goten and Chibi Trunks: *do dialogue between Merry and Pippin*  
  
Peregrin (Pippin) Took  
  
Goten and Chibi Trunks: *do exact same thing as last time, but switch roles*  
  
*the entire thing goes similarly to the Merry audition, just with slightly different dialogue, but more or less the same people, but I'm just too lazy to type much more*  
  
Ok, so vote. And you can also vote for characters I didn't have audition, if you really want to. And I might use them. Yay. Next up: The Elves. Not Keebler Elves, but if you review, you can have some Keebler Elf Cookies. *offers Keebler Elf Cookies to reviewers* Oh, and guys, I'm sorry about any problems with this. I hate my Internet. 


	2. The Elven Auditions Part 1

Pyra: So far on the vote for Hobbits we have….*motions to Damien*

Damien: *pulls down chart*

Chart:

**Frodo**:

            Yugi 3 (that's 3 outta 3, guys, I think he's a shoo-in)

**Bilbo**:

            Grandpa (YGO) 1

            Tai Itsukun 1 

**Pippin**:

            Goten 1

            Minako 1

            Joey 1

**Merry**:

            Chibi Trunks 1

            Makoto 1

            Seto 1

**Sam**:

            Joey 1

            Tasuki 1

**Lobelia**:

            Chibi-Usa 1

**Gaffer**:

            Roshi 1

**Gandalf**

            Roshi 1

**Legolas**

            Allen 1

  
Thanks to Merina, Ariana, kokes, and Dragon Ladysupreme for voting!  Especially Dragon Ladysupreme, who was the only one to vote for everything!   Oh, and I own nothing.  Except those really pretty earrings I bought yesterday and my Yu-Gi-Oh poster….but I don't own Lord of the Rings or the anime characters/series appearing in this fic.  Thank you.  Also, I apologize for keeping anyone waiting on any of my fics, I have been extremely busy as of late.  

***********

Pyra:  This time the Elves!  Hurray!  I get to interview hot bishounen!

Damien:  *temporarily OOC* And bishoujo.  *comes back in character* You DO have to have an Arwen you know.

Pyra:  Right.  Darn.  You can do that.  I'm sticking to my hot guys.

Damien:  Right.  I'm probably going to show up more in this chapter if Pyra gets too "stuck" on her "hot guys."

**Legolas**

Allen (Escaflowne):  *bows* Good day, my lady.

Pyra: *blushes slightly*  

Allen:  Would you like me to read now?

Pyra: No, no, that was perfect.

Allen:  What was perfect, my lady?

Pyra: That. 

Damien:  Maybe you should leave now, Allen, before Lady Pyra loses all ability of speech.

Allen:  *shrugs, leaves*

Damien: Next. *mutters* Please don't let her embarrass herself any more.

Kurama (YuYu Hakusho): *takes script* "Lothlorien!  Lothlorien!  We have come to the eaves of the Golden Wood!  Alas that it is winter!"

Pyra: *is impressed* *claps* Yay Kurama! 

Damien:  *applauds politely* Thank you Kurama.  Next.

Hotohori (Fushigi Yuugi): *walks in*

Pyra: *faints* x_x

Damien: *moves in front of her before Hotohori can say anything* Read, please.

Hotohori:  We have studied acting at the palace when we were a child.  "Lothlorien!  Lothlorien!  We have come to the eaves of the Golden Wood!  Alas that it is winter!"

Damien:  Very nice. *kick Pyra* Wake up, Lady.

Pyra:  *awake* Oh, did I miss Hotohori?!

Damien: Yes.

Pyra:  I think I'll go find him then.

Damien: No, you're going to stay and watch the rest of the auditions.  That is, if you can make it through them without fainting.

Eclipse (Demon Diary):  *mutters to self* Why am I doing this?

Raenef (DD): *calls from offstage* Because I asked you to!

Pyra: *hearts in eyes*

Damien: *sighs* It's going to be a long day.

Eclipse: "Lothlorien!  Lothlorien!  We have come to the eaves of the Golden Wood!  Alas that it is winter!"

Pyra: That was beautiful Eclipse.  Can I touch your hair?

Eclipse: No.

Pyra: *glares* *decides to go touch Eclipse's hair anyways*

Damien: *holding Pyra by her shirt*

Eclipse: Oo *leaves quickly*

Gourry (Slayers): What I am doing again?

Lina (Slayers) (from offstage):  Just read the paper Gourry.

Gourry: "Lothlorien!  Lothlorien!  We have come to the eaves of the Golden Wood!  Alas that it is winter!"  What did I just say?  What's an eave?

Pyra: *decides to end audition*

**Elrond**

Hiei (YYH):  *looks at script* *monotone* "There lies our hope, if hope it be.  To walk into peril – to Mordor.  We must send the Ring to the Fire."

Pyra: And you're _Kurama_'s boyfriend!?  He was way better!  Wouldn't he have rubbed off on you just a little?  *actually has a crush on Hiei*

Hiei: Oo  Kurama is not my boyfriend.  Where did you hear that?  Or did you just make it up? *pulls out katana* 

Pyra: *ignores katana* Really?  Great!

Hiei: *decides it might be a good time to leave and does so*

Seto: *reads just as monotone as Hiei* 

Pyra:  *seems to have gotten over the majority of her bishie obsession* Can't you guys spice it up a little more!? I mean, really!

Nakago:  *glares, sounds angry*" There lies our hope, if hope it be.  To walk into peril – to Mordor.  We must send the Ring to the Fire." *leaves*"

Pyra:  All the monotone guys, no matter how hot, have to audition at once don't they?

Damien:  Yes.

Pyra: *glares*

Tamahome:  I will do better than Nakago!  That'll get back at him for drugging me!

Nakago:  That wasn't me, Lady Yui drugged you.

Tamahome: You gave it to her!

Nakago: *shrugs* So?

Tamahome and Nakago: *fight*

Pyra: *cheers*  Finally, some action!  Go Nakago!  *waves flags* 

Damien: *stops fight*  Tamahome, just read your lines.

Tamahome: *reads lines* "There lies our hope, if hope it be.  To walk into peril – to Mordor.  We must send the Ring to the Fire."

Pyra: *examines fingernails* 

Tamahome: I better get paid.

Extremely large security peoples: *grab Tamahome by the arms and toss him offstage*

**Arwen**

Pyra: The plus side of this is that anyone would be better than Liv Tyler.

Usagi (SM): *walks on stage*

Pyra: I take that back.  Now, in the books, Arwen has NO lines.  She is a pointless character. The only thing she does is get married.  That's what going to be happening here.  I'm going to do this RIGHT.  So the contestants are just going to line up and try to look pretty.   Well…I'm going to do most of the book mostly right.  I can't do the whole thing, of course.  That book's just way to long!  

Contestants: *stand in line*

Line: *includes but is not limited to: Usagi (SM), Rei (SM), Hitomi (Escaflowne), Sakura (CCS), Sakura (Naruto), Raenef (DD), Erutis (DD), Yui (FY), Miaka (FY), Nuriko (FY), Soi (FY), Tea (YGO) and Mai (YGO)*

**Glorfindel******

Chris (DD): I will rid the world of the evil demons!  *thrusts fist into air* I will be the greatest Chief Cleric of Rased ever!  I will vanquish all the demons!  I am the Great Supergenius Chris!  

Damien: *sadly is being forced to handle this audition* -_-; Next.

Touya: Hey.  "It is you, Frodo, and that which you bear that brings us all in peril."

Damien: *nods politely* Next.

Chris: "It is you, Frodo, and that which you bear that brings us all in peril."  I will free the world from peril!  I will destroy the demons!

Damien: Next.

Dou (GW): *very energetically* "It is you, Frodo, and that which you bear that brings us all in peril."  Peril!  MWAHAHahahaha!!! *swings scythe* ^__^  I am Shinigami, the God of Death!  

Chris: Rased is the one true God!  With his aid, I, the Great Chris, will destroy all demons!!!

Damien: *has Chris removed by The Huge And Frighteningly Ugly Security Guards*

**Haldir**

Yukito (CCS): ^_^  Hello.  "The Dwarf breaths so loud we could have shot him in the dark." *turns into Yue*

Yue (CCS): "The Dwarf breaths so loud we could have shot him in the dark."  It's true, actually.  I'm sure, however, that I did much better than my host.  

Naruto (Naruto):  "The Dwarf breaths so loud we could have shot him in the dark." Can I go back the buffet now? 

Yukito:  There's a buffet?!

Naruto: Didn't you see it? It's this way, they have great stuff!

Yukito: Oh, good, I'm getting really hungry. 

Naruto and Yukito: *leave for buffet*

Pyra:  *looks at list* Ok, well, we have so many auditions and parts for Elves that I'm going to have to cut this section short.  We'll finish up the Elves and maybe start auditioning for the Wizards next time, so start thinking!  

Damien:  *nods, folds up list*


End file.
